The Donut of Life

Updates are infrequent because I don't have internet in my house, and won't until I can get this whole "in-state" "out of state" tuition thing taken care of.

Until then here is a brief conversation I had with a friend contemplating the nature of people as it relates to donuts. I think Homer would be proud.

My friend

i'd say, we're two different vectors of weirdo, in two different directions, pointing away from this one collective blob of averageness

Me

that sounds far too mathy for me

i like the idea of a donut

all the boring people are the hole

most everyone else is bursting with flavor

My friend

so you've contemplated hyperspace and hyperdonuts

Me

and then there are the sprinkles

i like to think i'm a sprinkle

i'm above the donut

My friend

flavor? shape?

Me

donut shaped

wait

My friend

the sprinkle is donut-shaped too? deep

Me

you mean what shape is the donut?

or the sprinkle

oh

sprinkle

um

My friend

the you!

Me

the sprinkles are a happy mix of whatever

i liked the dinosaur ones

My friend

excellent

Me

what about you?

what type of sprinkle are you?

or are you just doughy?

My friend

good question

Me

it's like contemplating your navel

but more homer simpsony

My friend

the caveat is that, regardless of where i am on this hyperdonut of existence, if i start walking forward in any direction, i'll eventually find myself right in the middle - exactly where i didn't want to be!

or, i could just stay in one place, which is even more boring

Me

unless you're walking around the outside ring

there is a trail that will keep you far from the center

My friend

but to find that exact path seems so hard to do!

fuck up one parameter and i'm in the middle again!

Me

but you're still outside of the dough

and unlike the empty middle

you have space

and color

and sugar

My friend

sugar!

Me

the spice of life?

the kryptonite of diabetics

My friend

and i always thought that salt was the ruler of spicitude

Me

it was until they discovered that it is found in abundance in the sea

suddenly the salt trade was over

but remember

My friend

shit!

Me

we're talking about the donut of reality here

not the bagel of being

My friend

you know, in the world of math, it's possible to turn donuts inside-out

Me

hahaha

My friend

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/b/ba/Inside-out_torus_(animated%2C_small).gif

Me

i feel like that would shred the donut-coffee continuum and bring the whole Dunkin Donuts of Reality crashing down

My friend

this is why most people aren't mathematicians!

Me

but if you notice the donut still ends up as a donut

which

helps me to conclude

that maybe that's already happened

My friend

maybe that's the midlife crisis?

Me

and instead of the chocolate icing and sprinkles being readily available and visible for all to rejoice about their instead buried deep within the dough of normalcy

thus meaning that to really find your inner sprinkle you have to bite deep through the averageness

My friend

which ultimately begs the conclusion: damn, it must suck to be a diabetic.